Today is “Spank-Out Day”, dedicated to raising awareness about the damage that spanking causes to children, and encouraging parents to find gentle, positive, loving, respectful and effective alternatives to guide our children through life.
Since as long as I can remember I’ve been against spanking or any other type of corporal punishment. I was occasionally spanked by my mom growing up, and never spanked by my dad. So, I am not one of those people who made the decision not to spank after experiencing it first hand. However, I did experienced the lack of connection, and I know how harmful that is.
Since I became a mom, Dr. Laura Markham’s words always stay with me as I parent my daughters ‘Connection before correction.’ The message sounds so simple, and yet it is so powerful. If that’s your mantra as a parent, even if you thought spanking was an option, you would never spank your kids. If you take the time to connect with them, to really CONNECT with them, with their feelings, with yours… from that place, it’s impossible to make the rational decision to physically harm your children in order for them to learn a lesson.
For those of you who need a little bit more convincing or information about the negative effects of spanking, and who need effective alternatives to it, here are some articles that are absolutely worth reading.
- “What is the difference between spanking and abuse?” by Dionna Ford at Code Name: Mama
- “I used to hit my children“, by Kimberly at TheSingleCrutch.com. Very brave, honest, eye-opening, redeming, hopeful piece. It’s never too late to make the right decisions by our children.
- “Redirecting the impulse to spank“, by Amy, Toddler in Tow.
- “Another letter to another pastor on spanking“, by Dulce at Dulce de Leche
Great readings about alternatives to corporal punishment:
- “Babes and Boundaries“, by Little Hearts/ Gentle Parenting Resources.
- “Alternatives to spanking“, by Positve-Parents.Org
- “No spanking, no yelling, no time-outs; what’s left?” by Alivingfamily.com
- “Best anti-spanking resources“, by Annie at PhDinParenting.com